Stop the presses!

Stop what you are doing! Put that sandwich down and listen up. Cheryl Cole has changed her hair. This is a bigger news story then Iraq and the Tsunami put together, or so it would seem judging by the tabloids today. As we don't want to miss out, we are getting in on the act too: OMG OMG Cheryl has slightly different yet kind of the same hair OMG OMG! 

Royal Appointment

This is the strange and rather disturbing cover of this week's Newsweek, celebrating 'Diana at 50. If she were here now'. According to Diana obsessive editor-in-chief Tina Brown, Diana would now be on Facebook, tweeting Gwyneth for exercise tips, and on to her third marriage...right. We have a question (other than the obvious one we hardly need mention): why does Diana look 70, rather than 50? And where exactly are her and Kate off to? We want to know! Diana's dress is pretty ace though, and this picture makes us miss her even more. Imagine what she would wear to the Met Ball! 

Dear Rosie

Dear Rosie,

A quick not just to say, please don't let those naysayers get you down. Yes, the reviews for Transformers 3 have been God awful really bad. Yes, the main reason for these negative reviews is your performance. Yes, Total Film describe you as 'awful - awful!' while Daily Mail claim you 'can't act for toffee.' But wait, there is good news. You have transformed (sorry) from a shy Devon schoolgirl to the most talked-about model in the world. Not a bad accomplishment, Rosie. Are we right? Yes. 

So forget all these horrible film critics, with their beer bellies and weak handshakes, and remember this: You are strong, you are beautiful, and no one wears a bikini better than you. Well, apart from Megan Fox. Ouch! 

Style Artillery x 

Happy Beverley Day!

She's back! The Queen of UK soul, and personal favourite of Style Artillery, Beverley Knight, is back with a new single and album. Cementing her status as a true Soul Sister, the album is conveniently called Soul UK (out next Monday folks). Here at Style Artillery, we fell in love with Beverley when we first heard the fabulously dramatic Sista Sista, and she has continued to impress ever since. Be sure to download her new single, Mama Used To Say. Do it now! 

Something for the Weekend

The summer sales have begun! So here is our pick of the sales for you to hit this weekend. First up, a simple pleated dress from Zara, which has been reduced by ten pounds to only £39.99 and includes a cute brown belt. Our second choice for this sizzler of a weekend is Topshop mesh shirt, with leather trim, ooo! This is down from £34 to only £15 so don't hang about. We suggest you pair it with a cowboy hat and a couple of pistols...

Buy this dress here

Buy this shirt here 

Bag it up

What do we have here? Why, its only that New York clothes horse Olivia Palermo, showing us yet again the way to dress our best. Olivia often takes risks in her style choices, but never breaks the cardinal fashion rule: never, ever match your bag to your shoes. Not ever. Like, ever. Okay? Especially in the evening. Oh, unless the bag is black, naturally.  Unfortunately, we see far too many desperate matchy-matchy girls who, for some reason, think that their bag has to colour-match to their shoes. Who told them this, their glaucoma-suffering grandmother? It wasn't Palermo, that's for sure. Please take note, readers: Palermo's bag is pink, and her shoes are not. This is a good thing, we repeat: a good thing! Also worthy of note is Olivia's bright and beautiful orange dress, which nicely clashes (again, a good thing) with her clutch. Is there anything this girl doesn't look good in?

 

Pastel Princess

Taylor: But I like black! 

Stylist: Which is exactly why I insist you try this beautiful pastel dress.

Taylor: Peach? Gross!

Stylist: Well peach is the new black. 

Taylor: Seriously, I cant wear this. I look like a little girl.

Stylist: Taylor, honey, you are a little girl. 

Taylor: What will all my rock music fans think?

Stylist: Who cares what those burn outs think? Do you want to get movie roles or not?

Taylor: Actually, I don't really - wait, what the hell are they?

Stylist: Boots for tonight.

Taylor: No way! No way am I wearing those hideous things! And white? Come on, don't they at least have them in black?

Stylist: No black tonight!

Taylor: Please! How about a black bag?

Stylist: No.

Taylor: Look, I'll wear the damn dress and boots if I can take a black bag, and wear fishnets. 

Stylist: Absolutely not! 

Taylor: Okay just the bag...

Stylist: Deal. But promise me you will go easy on the eye make up, Taylor.

Taylor: I promise. 

Something for the Weekend

As the weather isn't looking so good for this weekend, our recommendations today are those of the waterproof kind. First up is a beautiful midi draped belted mac, from ASOS Premium. With a choice of caramel or blue (go for the caramel), this £70 waterproof will protect you from the rain and have passers-by looking jealously on as you skip past them, Palermo-style. If you want to break the bank this weekend, go for this studded python (yes, python) trench by Burberry Prorsum at Net-A-Porter. At an eye-watering £5,995 this piece will keep animal-lovers fuming, as well as your bank manager. 

Buy this coat here

By this coat here

Shoniwa us the Way

No, we couldn't pull this off either. But Shingai Shoniwa (you know, her of Noisettes fame) shows us once again that she is cool enough to rock pretty much any outfit she lays her hands on. We freely admit that if this had been Hilton, Cole or even Her Royal Highness Huntington-Whitely, we would have been full of scorn and abuse. Let's face it, there are few celebs out there who could pull off purple leopard print shoes matched with some crazy-ass blue circus outfit. Not forgetting that bow on her head. Yet somehow this look, well, works. All we can say is - rock it girl!

Swanning Down The Aisle

So, Carolina Herrera has been named as the designer for Bella Swan's wedding dress in Twilight Breaking Down Dawn. For months the wedding dress designer has been shrouded in secrecy, but finally confirmed via Twitter by the film's studio Summit. We wonder what it will look like... Will it have wings? Will it be black? Oh wait, we don't actually give two hoots. Because we are not nine years old. So sue us*

*please don't sue us.

Who Gives a Sheet?

Wouldn't it be great if we all had bed-sheets this nice? That way, we could quite literally roll out of bed to attend posh events like the amFAR Gala, à la Heidi Klum, who seems to have turned up in her favourite Egyptian cotton. The reason we cant do this is because a) we weren't invited, and b) our sheets have questionable stains that wont wash out, despite using stain remover on a 90°C wash. Even more questionable was the presence of local tramp pop-star Ke$ha, who appeared to forget both her hairbrush and the front half of her dress. Yes, she really is still doing that eye-roll/growl/slut face of hers...

Sibling Rivalry

When it comes to wedding style etiquette, its often difficult to know what is suitable and what isn't. Is wearing white a no-no, or would the bride be chuffed at your confidence and originality? Should all skirts and dresses be knee-length or below? Should you snog the best man during the last dance? Whilst we're sure Sarah Owen considered at least one of these things before her sister Lily Allen's wedding, we cant quite put our finger on what made her choose this highly 'original' piece of Star Trek memorabilia dress. Never have we seen such an unusual cleavage display as this dress provides (some sort of built-in cup holder, perhaps?) In any case, when your sister is the bride, its probably best not to get your baps out quite so shamelessly. Unless you happen to be Courtney Love's sister, in which case - anything goes. 

Something for the Weekend

It's Friday and it's time to party! For those of you not getting wet at the Isle of Shite Festival, here are our recommendations to make your weekend outfit go with a bang. Why not channel Diana Vickers in this colour block shift dress from Topshop? At only £46, its the perfect fit for cocktails with the girls tomorrow night, and encapsulates this season's colour block trend without making you look like THIS. For the boys, we have selected these beautiful blue suede brogues from Topman. At £65, these will make all the right signals to fashion conscious gals at the bar. Be brave, boys, colour is a good thing! 

Buy these shoes here

Buy this dress here 

Car Crash Kidman

Nicole Kidman has inflicted many style horrors on us over the years, but none has been quite so offending as the hideously nauseating creation she is brandishing here at the CMT Music Awards in Nashville. The rather revolting odd ensemble includes green and blue stripes, brown sheer, and lilac shoes that even Anna Nicole Smith would have avoided. We honestly cant get our head around what Kidman was thinking when her stylist told her she looked 'fierce' in this monstrosity. Wait, is that velour? We think we may be sick...

Chung About Town

Now that's more like it! Alexa is back to her Birkin best in a 60s mini dress and basket bag whilst on a stroll in NYC. If anyone can pull off a top-to-toe homage to Jane Birkin, its Alexa, who has been vocal about her love of everything 1960s. We love just about every part of this outfit*, as we love just about everything about Alexa, even if she does get it a bit wrong sometimes. Glad to have you back, Chung.

*it took us a while to come to terms with the pee-stained collar. 

Who needs shoes? Jane Birkin sans basket

Zut!

Listen To Your Gut, Dunst

Stylist: ...and here are some hoop earrings to complete the look.

Kirsten: Um, I'm not so sure about this outfit.

Stylist: What do you mean?

Kirsten: I just don't think its really 'me'.

Stylist: But darling its the CFDA Awards, you have to be imaginative. 

Kirsten: Yes, but I was thinking more, you know, like a floaty dress or something.

Stylist: Boring! You are always in dresses, I want people to take you more seriously!

Kirsten: You think people don't take me seriously?

Stylist: Well...

Kirsten: I just won the Best Actress award at Cannes! 

Stylist: Look, just think of yourself as Chloe Sevigny for the evening.

Kirsten: But I hate her - she looks like shit! She must have a badger for a stylist.

Stylist: Actually, I used to be her stylist. 

Kirsten: Oh.

Stylist: And, for the record, I'm only working with you tonight as Jessica Alba was already taken.

Kirsten: How dare you!

Stylist: That's right, and now you have to walk down the red carpet looking like an 80s lesbian hooker. 

Kirsten: But you told me suits were in! 

Stylist: Yeah, well, I say a lot of things... 

Bootiful Booth

Just a quick post to say OMG how super-hot and totally amazing did the super-hot and totally amazing Douglas Booth look at the Royal Academy of Arts Summer Preview Party? It just goes to show that when time is tight, you can grab a plain white t-shirt and skinny jeans and still look this good*

*provided, of course, that you look like Douglas Booth

The Future Looks Rosie

Holy Smokes! Rosie Huntington-Whitlely looks, well, smoking hot on this month's UK Elle. With a common hot boyfriend (Kelly Brook reject Jason Statham), a huge modelling career and a role as Megan Fox's replacement in the upcoming Transformers 3, it seems Rosie is slowly taking over the world, one industry at a time (what next, a Naomi style novel?) Whilst we wait to pass judgement on Rosie's acting abilities this summer, we can for now at least gawp over cushion-lipped Rosie's amazing face.